I know I haven’t written to you in a long interval but Today is the day when people say wishes are granted. So I couldn’t resist myself. Here I’m sitting by the terrace and looking at the crescent,Imaging what life would have been If August 21st haven’t had happened…
💎💎 21st August,2006 💎💎
“Chay le lo chay .. chaye le lo chaye garma garam chay.”…
“Bhaiya saman dedo apna, hum uthalenge”
“Nahin Nahin saheb hum uthalenge .. bus 10 rupeyee hi dedena”
“Side se hato yaar.. Rasta dedo..Jaldi jaldi Chalo”..
The hustle bustle of railway station had always found a way to up lift the curves of my lips.They gave me a feeling of belongingness.
As I stepped down the iron beast, engulfed in the cloud of smoke , I felt like a superstar . Well for me my landing was a perfect shot taken from SRK’s MHN. Okay! U got me right, a die hard SRK fan! And a blind believer of true love. Only if I could find one! The kind of love that lasts for a life time. That’s enough for one to live his life in the memories of his beloved. The kind of love that’s described in novels. That existed between Raj and simran, that led jack to give the wooden plank to rose…
“Aouch!! Dekh k Chalo na bhaiya” an irritated sweet voice shouted at me. Dumbfounded I stared back at her. Her eyes were like the deep ocean that held a lot of treasures of secrets. The intensity of her gaze could melt any stone. Then she turned and hurried to the platform no.2 and in the process crushed the faint hope of love that was starting to bloom in my heart”. For the umpteenth time I lost another potential love interest. Yeah I’m a single, desperate, miserable guy leading a hopeless lovelife. For a guy who was in love with DDLJ n had completed his college days dreaming of the day when his Anjali would say”Kuch Kuch hota hey , Arjun Tum Nahin samjhoge” , not finding a love was like a malignant tumor.And there goes the dreamer Arjun…
Anything and everything that happens on the world was a potential distracting element for me. I was in the city of dreams. The city that had the reputation of being insomniac. “Amchi Mumbai”.I loved the way Vidya valan used to say “goooood moooornning Mumbai”. And during the initial days of my hangover I used to imitate her. Her voice was so beautiful n fresh….
“Beta dekh k Nahin chal sakte. Avi lag jaati toh gharwalon ko call Karne k haal mein v Nahin rahte.” A trembling hand jerked me towards the corner of the road as a speeding goods carrier rushed past me. A ghust of cold air dashed into my lungs. And my eyes moistened with the Impact.
My life had never mattered to anyone, untill now. After being raised by myself (orphan!! yeah that’s the word) I have never thought my life could ever matter to anyone. That’s why I craved for pure love. That’s why I craved for families n emotional love. That’s why Kuch Kuch hota hey was my favorite not Kavi khusi kabhi ghum. Oye,baba,bhaiya,saheb n Arjun that’s what people call me. Never once in my life,One had called me beta let alone worrying for my life.
Slowly I turned my eyes in the upward direction to the face. The old wrinkles had linned his face in a crisscross manner as if displaying the hardness of life he had to endure. His eyes was moist. N his whole body was trembling with the morning chills after the August rain. He was carrying a basket full of vegetables. From his clothes I could say that he was a vendor. Again I concentrated my gaze on his face . To me it was the kindest face I have ever seen . His wrinkles were beauty lines for me. At that moment I encountered with the first love of my life. I instantly fell a tug of attachment towards the old man.
I returned from the trance.I blinked down the tears.My voice trembled as I said “sukriya baba!” He being oblivious of the tourmil going inside me replyed casually,”pata Nahin aaj Kal k logon ka.. dekh k chal v Nahin pate par pata Nahin paise kese kama lete hein”. I smiled . He was a typical Indian old man,Complaing about the new generation. If it were any other time I would have jumped into the argument. But I smiled and listened to his blabbering.
“Will You come with me!?” Suddenly I heard myself asking. I didn’t know what had possessed me and why was a I asking that to a stranger out of blue. But then he was no longer a stranger to me. He was everything I had in this world.
He stared back at me astonished. I was counting on my luck for the first time. For the first time I left everything on luck, completely unexpected.
“Yes” he replied.
The house felt lonely but this time the loneliness didn’t hunt me. I had a wall full of photographs. Memories,that would last for the life . Within the past 10 years I have changed a lot. From being a hopeless romantic to a responsible practical person. I have achieved a lot. From being small start-up planner to an established entrpruner, I have matured a lot. In this long journey I have found a family;Me, my baba n sheru, our dog. As I lit the Diya Infront of the framed photo of baba sheru came running. I ruffled his furs , while doing so I missed my parents. 10 years ago he had came to my life and now , today he left the world , left my world. The difference is at that time I didn’t know to whom I belong, now all my existence was screaming the signature of that person who had been my mentor, support,pioneer ;My FATHER. I was no longer an orphan screaming , questioning, n shouting at the universe for his identity. Now I knew whom I belong. The 21 year vagabond had now gotten a place to seek solace.
Today when I burned the only human I had in this world,A part of me was relieved . He was suffering for the last 2 years. But, when I lie on my bed with sheru at my footrest I started feeling lonely. I missed his caughs , I missed his feble voice , I missed taking care of him n more than that I missed his care n love. I was incomplete without him.I went to the terrace n looked at the crescent . N I found my companion. Even The full moon decreases to crescent. But then the crescent grows into a full moon.The cycle goes on…
…. Then I realized if 21st August haven’t had happened I would have been lost in the maddening crowd of this cruel world,where every one claims to know the other but their own pain is hidden from their heart. And now on the Christmas Eve I wish I could be someone like my baba. If he couldn’t come back to me then I could be a ‘baba’ for someone. Dear ,I know you can’t speak or express like us but thanks for listening to my every blabbering. ………. Arjun